Bathroom Trauma
by Ryosami
Summary: Somehow, Rue and Mytho knocked me out and locked me into the girls washroom. And...I'm not a girl. And...why is Ahiru here? And...I think I see where this is going... AF, oneshot,swearing


AN : Just to tell you, this changeroom/washroom links from the swimming pool to the hallway, which is why it has 2 doors.

-

There was a throbbing pain in the back of his head…and as Fakir scanned his surroundings…

No.

He did NOT just see what he thought he saw.

As he glanced frantically around his surrounding he noticed something extremely out of place…

There were no white stools.

And that only meant one thing.

He was in the girls washroom.

Silence.

"WHAT THE HELL!"

Fakir ran over to the exit and pounded at the door. "SOMEONE HELP ME!" He twisted the doorknob as much as he could like a mad man but it did no good.

The door was locked from the outside.

The other door was the same.

His mouth hung open in shock.

"THE EFF!"

And from outside the door, unbeknownst to everyone but the readers, there was a menacing laugh…

It sounded an awful lot like a pair of ravens.

-

"Ahiru-chan!" A blond friend waved over to her dense swimming buddy. "Can you help me with something?"

"Yeah?" Our beloved ducky-friend turned over to her friend's direction, with a used, wet towel behind her head. "What is it?"

"I'm like, so TOTALLY stupid!" Ririe started murdering herself and cursing with words such as "baka" and other Japanese swearing words the author does not know of. "I forgot my car keys in the girls washroom!"

"Oh leave it to me I'll go get them for you!" She said it with absolutely no hesitation, and with a bright, optimistic smile, she jogged over to the girls washroom.

"YOSHHHH!" Ririe winked and gave a "peace-out" hand sign to the blond friend that was spying in the nearby corner.

"…" Pique did nothing but give her an unbelievable stare.

"What?" Clueless as always, she cocked her head to the side.

"YOU DON'T EVEN DRIVE A CAR, RIRIE!" She yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Oh YEAHHHHH…I totally forgot!" She grinned like a hyena and it didn't stop. "It's not like that'll matter! She didn't even figure that out yet!"

"…The stupidity of these people is just unbelievable." Pique swore to herself under her breath and pleaded to the ceiling. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THIS WORLD, DROSSELMEYER!"

-

Ahiru opened the door and she felt as if she stepped on something cushy and soft…

IT WAS A DEAD BODY.

No. It was just Fakir. But he didn't look alright…

Ahiru leaned over and tapped him on the shoulder. "Fakir? Is that you? Are you okay?"

"Urgharghmmhmmrgg" Fakir's eyes were hooded and it took him approximately thirty-seven seconds to realize that what stood before him was a human being. Who could blame him? He waited for nearly fifteen minutes. (AN : err…just pretend that it's a long time )

"Hello?" Ahiru's eyes were questioning.

"AHHHH sorry!" Fakir's eyes displayed a horrible amount of terror as he waved his hands desperately and quickly turned around. "IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!"

"What?" Ahiru raised one of her eyebrows. "…And I'm not naked, so why did you turn around?"

"Err…yes…well…" Fakir began to splutter gibberish like mad. "Normally girls would think I'm just being horny and ecchi and just decided to plop myself into one of these female washrooms just to check out their privates and all this other nonsense that I would NEVER do in my life and I don't even know how I got here I just…"

"So you're here because?" Ahiru was clearly lost.

"I DON'T KNOW HOW I GOT HERE!" Fakir exclaimed. Then an image floated past his mind. "I bet it was Mytho…"

"How can you blame him if you don't even have proof?" Ahiru justified. "It's not right, accusing him…"

"Who cares." Fakir walked over to the door and just realized that it had been shut…after the brief moment that it WAS open, which was when Ahiru came in.

…

NO.

Again, he frantically twisted the doorknob like mad but it remained…

Locked.

He ran to the other door but it also remained…

Locked.

"Oh, we're locked in." Ahiru commented casually.

In the midst of trauma, Fakir could not believe it. "HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT SO EASILY!"

"Umm, it's ok, someone will come along and help us out…" Ahiru grinned and thought of the bright side, being a person of optimistic nature.

"Did you ever think of what people might think after seeing a guy like me in a girl's change room?" Fakir reminded her.

"Oh…yeah." Ahiru giggled and scratched her head. "Didn't think of that…" Yes, Ahiru was a person of dense nature as well.

"No matter, I have the perfect solution!" Fakir grinned menacingly. "Hehehe…and Mytho thought he had my fate sealed, just you wait…" He walked over to one of the stalls and took out a roll of toilet paper.

"What are you trying to do with that paper?" Ahiru questioned as she saw Fakir get to work.

"I'm writing a story of how we could escape this washroom by having one of the doors unlock." Quickly, Fakir dug into his swimming boxers pocket and instantly his hand returned with…

Nothing.

Fakir gawked.

"Did you forget that you didn't change yet?" Ahiru asked.

Fakir sighed.

Ahiru patted his back. "It's alright, let's just wait for someone to come along."

Fakir nodded.

So they waited.

-

Fakir and Ahiru sat, side by side, waiting for a person…ANY PERSON…to come into the washroom and rescue them.

However, as time passed by, he noticed Ahiru to be more and more beautiful…

Her glossy orange-red hair, which was still wet…

Her beautiful, emotional blue eyes…

Her cute frame…

"FAKIR! CAN YOU HEAR ME!"

Ahiru shook Fakir out of his daydream and asked him a question for the 5th time. "I SAID…DO YOU LIKE SWIMMING!"

"Oh, sorry." And Fakir went back to his daydream. "Yeah, sure, I like Ahiru."

"You like me?"

"Yeah."

"…I was asking you if you liked swimming."

"Yeah, that too."

And then he realized.

The reality.

"NONONO, THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!" Fakir searched for the right answer, now that he blurted out his inner thoughts.

"So you don't like me…" Ahiru dropped her head in disappointment. "And I thought we became friends after that incident with Mytho…"

"Well, I DO like you…just…" He was having trouble searching for the right words. "I really really really like you."

"So you like me?" Ahiru concluded, in her simple-minded point of view.

"No! I mean…" Fakir was about to explode.

"So you don't like me." Ahiru was sad again.

"ARGH, I MEAN I LOVE YOU!" Fakir was so frustrated he couldn't believe he was talking to an idiot like Ahiru.

"Really?" Ahiru grinned. "You really really really do love me?"

"Yes, really." Fakir confessed.

He confessed.

WHAT?

This was not comprehendible. He confessed…WHAT?

"Listen I-"

His words were cut off with a kiss.

A cheek kiss.

"I love you too!" Ahiru was blushing but she still managed to speak the words she needed to speak.

Then Fakir kissed her.

On the lip.

And so began a make-out session.

-

"Now which key was it…" A paw fumbled with the keys to the school doors and finally grasped the correct one for the female change room. "Aha." He pushed the key into the doorknob and twisted it. The two girls, one pink-haired and one blond-haired, awaited with hope behind their teacher.

Neko-sensei stopped in his tracks as he gawked at the sight before him.

Ahiru was on top of Fakir.

The two girls were thoroughly disappointed in them. Their pose was extremely cliché, which was NOTHING out of the ordinary (for them).

Fakir was wearing nothing for a top, since he was only wearing swimming boxers.

Ahiru wore nothing but the…schoolgirl uniform she always wore.

Pique and Ririe were both even MORE exasperated.

How could Ahiru still be wearing still! It should be thrown on the floor by now!

Meanwhile…

Neko-sensei glared with a fiery intensity unmatched by the typical flame. "AHIRU-SAN! As punishment for acting inappropriately on school grounds, I demand that you marry me this instant!"

Ahiru quickly got off Fakir's body and apologized immediately. "Yes, Neko-sensei, I'm truly sorry this will NEVER happen again!"

"And as for YOU…" Neko-sensei switched his attention over to Fakir. "I am APALLED. I would never expect a pleasant student such as you to be influenced…"

Fakir was too busy daydreaming about the make-out session they just had to pay attention to what Neko-sensei was saying, at the moment. He replayed what he saw in his head and then realized what Neko-sensei had just said when he interrupted them…

"SHE'S MARRYING ME NOT YOU!" Fakir declared.

And suddenly Neko-sensei disappeared from his sight , leaving only black raven feathers…

-

"Fakir? FAKIR!" Ahiru yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Urgharghmmhmmrgg" Fakir's eyes slowly opened and saw that it was Ahiru who was in front of him, in a ballet suit.

"I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD BE MY DANCE PARTNER FOR THE UPCOMING FESTIVAL!" Ahiru yelled again, as though she was scared he wouldn't be able to hear her.

"What? NO, YOU'RE MARRYING ME, NOT HIM!"

Fakir was still half-asleep.

"What's with you today, Fakir?" Ahiru cocked her head to the side and tried to understand him. "Are you alright?"

"Huh? Oh…yeah, I'm fine. I'll be your partner." Fakir rubbed his eyes as he slowly woke up.

"Great!" Ahiru beamed.

Damn that…Rue and Mytho… 

_And Ahiru's friends…_

_And most importantly…_

_Neko-sensei!_

AN : Originally I supported the Mytho and Ahiru pairing, and I was truly disappointed because I there was no fanfiction that had it. But as I was writing this story I found that it was extremely hard to write about Mytho, since I just can't seem to put him in a parody-like situation…I mean, he's so serious!

I would be one to think this story was crazy-stupid if I was a reader, so I'd understand how you would feel. I think I was high writing this, hehe…grins sheepishly…and after writing this, I guess I've come to like the Fakir and Ahiru pairing.

Hopefully, there will be more fanfiction in the future for Princess Tutu!

I really hope you enjoyed this story. If it won't be in your way, please review and tell me what you think! Any helpful tips on how to improve my writing skills would be greatly appreciated.

Until later.


End file.
